I discovered a new song today!

Well, this afternoon I'm just talking to Jesus. Whining & complaining (like His children do at times) about this season of waiting He has me in. I want Him to move now, and He just keeps saying "Be still & know that I am God," "wait for Him [expectantly]," "your strength will come in settling down in complete dependence on Me," and that's just the tip of the iceberg when it comes to the verses He's given me. I digress. Anyway, when I finished I walked back into my room and the Praise & Worship Pandora station just so happened (totally NOT a coincidence. God speaks, we just have to listen!) to be playing this song.... 

Perfect right? A stern smack for complaining, but such a loving embrace saying "TRUST ME!" If you are in a time of waiting, please know that God is faithful! He is not a God that can lie or renege on His promises. He will do what He told you He would do. That marriage will happen, children will come, your business will open, He'll make a way for school, and whatever else He's promised will come. Trust His timing. He's just preparing us for the promise He is taking us into. He is pruning, chiseling, and transforming in this time. Embrace it! Praise Him through this storm. It's not easy, and sometimes it hurts. BUT it will transform your perspective. I hope this song encourages you while you wait. 

I love you <3. 

"Yet God has made everything beautiful for its own time. He has planted eternity in the human heart, but even so, people cannot see the whole scope of God's work from beginning to end." Ecclesiastes 3:11 (NLT)

Who/what has your heart this Vday?

This is such a sad day for so many people. It breaks my heart to think that. Love cannot be found on this earth unless it is found first in Christ.  This morning I spent my time with my first true Love, Jesus. We had breakfast together, sang together, and made vows together. It was beautiful. As I was finishing my time with Him He laid the book of Hosea on my heart. 

[Background info.: The book of Hosea is a story of a man named Hosea who was called to marry a prostitute/adulterous wife. Whether or not this is to be taken as a parable or reality is debated. However, the purpose is to portray God's love for US. We are the prostitute/adulterous wife that "cheat" on God all the time. Yet, He still loves and remains in covenant marriage with us]. 

Hosea 2:9 (NLT) says "She doesn’t realize it was I who gave her everything she has — the grain, the new wine, the olive oil; I even gave her silver and gold. But she gave all My gifts to Baal." This is so fitting for the world we live in today, especially on this holiday. God has given us many gifts, and we turn them into idols. We worship the gift instead of worshiping the gift Giver. Here are some examples...

1. God gave us the gift of marriage/relationship (see Genesis 2:18). Yet so many of us (male & female) create an idol out of our significant other. We place them on pedestals they can never stand on, and then we expect them to fulfill every need and void we have. That is the Lord's job! Placing that job in human hands always leads to disappointment. It also brings stress to the person who you place in that position. They are not able to live up to those standards. BUT Jesus is! The Lord longs to fill us. He longs to reveal His love for us! He longs for our hearts to know Him intimately and be content in Him. He wants to be in relationship with you. He's your Husband (Isaiah 54:5) 
2. God gave us sex within the context of marriage as a gift (see 1 Corinthians 7:1-5). This is insanely idolized in our society. You can just turn on your TV to see how we have exploited this gift. So many things are sensual on TV because "sex sells." Young girls are being implicitly taught that their worth lies in their bodies, and the way to true love is through exposing yourself to a man. This is NOT what the Lord meant it for. He meant it to unify ONE wife and ONE husband. He meant it to allow us to procreate and receive the blessing of children. The Lord even delights in our sex with our spouses. Just read Song of Solomon. He is all for it UNTIL we use it outside of context it was created within. 
3. Money. This is another big one. God delights in blessing us (see Proverbs 3:9-10). However, He does not delight in us using those blessings for evil or idolizing it. When the sole purpose in what we strive for is money that does not glorify God. Everything we have is because God allowed it. Yet when He asks for 10% we throw a fit. He says the love of money is the root of all evil (1 Timothy 6:10). Our strive should be to be in the will of God for our lives. Pursue in what He has called you to and He will meet all your needs (financially, emotionally, physically, spiritually, etc). Seek His Kingdom first (Matthew 6:33)

Guys, please know that the only reason I can speak on these topics is because I have done every single one (and this is a SHORT list!). The Lord totally convicted my heart this morning about where I was seeking my love first. It was not Him. Yet, He is faithful still. He pursues my heart EVERYDAY, and He shows His love to me in every moment.


So today, don't focus on what you don't have. If you are single, focus on the Lord being your Husband and the Lover of your soul. Let Him satisfy that deep longing within you to be loved. He created it! He knows how to fill it.  If you are in a relationship, show your love for your spouse/significant other CHRIST's way (1 Corinthians 13). Pray today. Ask the Lord to show you His love for you. Ask Him to allow that love to over flow through you to others. Ask Him to show you that even if you are "alone" you don't have to be lonely because He is with you. Ask Him to open your eyes to see the love notes He leaves. I promise you, He leaves them everywhere. We are just so often caught up that we miss them. Don't miss them today, loves. He's pursuing you!


 
I hope reading this was encouraging to you. My intent is never to judge or condemn, but in love to reveal God's heart for you as He reveals it to me. 

I love you. But God loves you more!! Happy Valentine's Day <3! 

“I have loved you, my people, with an everlasting love. With unfailing love I have drawn you to Myself." Jeremiah 31:3 (NLT)

(My promise ring. Jesus, my Hope, is my Husband first and always <3)

Introductions & such...

HEY :)! I'm Zakia & this is my story. I am a 21 year old college student, and I guess you could say I'm not your "stereotypical" college student. But, I used to be until approximately one year ago when my world was radically changed by Jesus Christ. However, for you to understand I'll have to go a little farther back....I was raised in a Christian home. My mother and grandmother served the Lord, FAITHFULLY! They are archetypal role models of women of God. They taught me Psalm 23 the moment I started talking, and I have had Matthew 28:19-20 memorized as long as I can remember (this will be important later!). However, despite this amazing blessing I never got to know Christ for myself. 

I have spent most of my life seeking fulfillment, worth, and attention in various avenues. I have tried people-pleasing, drinking, drugs, sex, men, my body, my accomplishments, and relationships. NONE of these worked. They would sustain for a very temporal moment, but at the end of the day I was empty. I was insecure. I was confused. I was hurting, and worst of all I did not even know it. I did not love myself. Therefore, I did not think anyone else could love me. Needless to say my life before Christ was painful and dark, and the worst part is I did not even realize it. I had heard many times about God's love, and I believed in my head that He was there and He loved me. However, my heart wanted nothing to do with this truth. 

This all changed in February of 2012. A visiting Pastor at my current church preached a sermon on the Prodigal Son story in Luke 15. However, He preached it as the "Prodigal God." To give a quick overview the prodigal son refers to a child who had it all. He was the son of a king with an amazing inheritance waiting on him. However, he decided he wanted his inheritance early. His father gave it to him, and the son went away and squandered away his inheritance on useless things (that did not sustain him!). I had heard this story countless times. I had even read it for myself before. However, this day was different. The pastor taught it with emphasis on the father and his response to his son's actions (it's a GREAT depiction of God's love. I totally encourage you to read it!). This spoke DIRECTLY to my heart. For the first time I had a real connection with God's love, not only in my mind but in my heart. I did not fully understand it, and I still don't. But in that moment all I knew was the joy, fullness, and peace that overwhelmed me when I rededicated my life to Christ. That day I began a personal relationship with Christ that I am still growing in today. 

Fast forward through this intense period of growing over the past year.... Today, I am a totally different person. I am far from perfect. I fall everyday, but now I have God's grace to pick me up everyday. Sometimes, I forget God loves me. Sometimes, I forget that He is the lover of my soul and my portion forever. Sometimes, I forget He is my Husband (Isaiah 54:5). But through it all He relentlessly pursues my heart. I am on a journey to coming to know Him more intimately, and it is such a joyous (and sometimes painful) ride. I love Him because He first loved me (1 John 4:19). 


Now, that I've sufficiently told you about who I am (maybe more than you cared to know :)) I can get to the point of this blog. First of all, people keep telling me that I am a good writer (judge for yourself), and I would hate to waste a gift the Lord has given me. Secondly, remember my statement about Matthew 28:19-20 being important?? Well, I am beginning a journey in learning to walk this out in my daily life. It says "Therefore, go and make disciples of all nations, baptizing them in the name of the Father and the Son and the Holy Spirit. Teaching these new disciples to obey all the commands I have given you. And be sure of this: I am with you always, even to the end of the age." Through this blog I hope to allow you an inside peak as I learn to walk this commandment out daily. I'll be posting about my journey as a bible study group leader (and the struggles that come along with that position), any  mission trip opportunities, as well as any Word the Lord lays on my heart to share. I hope that my journey encourages someone else to persevere through theirs <3 <3! Until next time!

"The harvest is plenty, but the workers are few" Matthew 9:37